Looking in the mirror trying to evaluate who I am and why requires introspection and a journey back into my life. I see that my love of music (especially) and poetry has always been encouraged by my family who supported creativity and expression. I look at my reflection and see my strengths that come directly from the relationships I cherish and I treasure the support they provide in my life. My father died right before my older brother returned home from Vietnam in 1972. The loss I experienced in my world was indescribable, and my brother, who is twelve years older than me, stepped in to ease the pain. My passion for music was encouraged by my mother, but she was immersed in her own loss and could hardly function. I lost months of memory, and some of my brothers joked and teased me about living in the heart, not the head, but my older brother understood. He understood how much I loved my dad and that Dad had always seen me as the "sensitive" one. My brother continued to cultivate the creative part of my heart that loved music so much. To get me out of the shell I had taken refuge in, he took me for walks in the woods, told me stories and made me sing with him all the time. He shared with me the music he loved and helped me find comfort in what had always made me shine. Even though the rest of my siblings teased me, they still called me their "buttercup" and mom always said I was the sunshine of her world. Ever since I was very little I was always singing or humming and was able to find the positive side in everything, which I continue to do even now. Music is the voice with which I express emotions and those around me can see it. I've often wondered if sharing music with... middle of paper... active force has been a lifeline for me throughout my life. In the garden of my life, everything grows from the seeds of music and flourishes with the water of laughter and joy. When I read Alice Walker's assessment of her mother's garden that led her to discover her own (675), it struck me more deeply than the relentless obsession Rodriguez encountered with his educational pursuit. Until now I had never really looked at how important music has been in my life, or what role it has played. I just knew I never wanted to be without it. Music is as integral a part of my existence as breathing is to life; It's something I can't live without. Works Cited Rodriguez, Richard, In Search of Our Mothers' Gardens, Ways of Reading, Boston: Bedford/St. Martin's, 2008 PrintWalker, Alice, Wish Fulfillment, Ways of Reading, Boston: Bedford/St. Martin's, print of 2008