This essay is not about the "perfect" family. This essay is about a successful family, i.e. a family that meets most of its members' needs and goals. A family where everyone is physically safe and emotionally content. To achieve this, let's look at three key factors of a successful family. The best interests of children. No one thinks about divorce on the day of the wedding except prenuptial lawyers. You and your partner promise to communicate well and solve problems based on your love and commitment to each other. Then the kids arrive and it seems like your family life is “established.” Ten years later, you and your partner agree that you no longer want to be together for numerous reasons. And the children? Should we stay together for the good of our children, to give them a home "with two parents"? Or should you separate and be the best parents you can be? There are two schools of thought on this topic: that one should hang on together until the children grow up and move out on their own, or that an unhappy couple makes everyone around them, especially children, unhappy. The only correct answer is your answer. Regardless of what your brother thinks, what your best friend thinks, or what Oprah thinks, never replace anyone's judgment with your own. The needs of every family are different; what works for one family may not work for your family. After growing up, many people who grew up in unhappy families say that it is better to come from a broken home than to live in one. Others, however, say that having two parents was fundamental to their growth, even if mom and dad were not happy with each other. Sometimes "together" is in the eye of the beholder. It may not mean that you and your spouse or partner are living under…half of paper…practical or useful. Give yourself some credit! Try these tips in your family that don't require much time and effort and are simple ways to help your family resolve problems and get along: (1) Talk to each other! "How was your day?" "How is it going?" Ask about each other rather than always talking about yourself. If you get one-word answers like "fine," delve a little deeper, but don't push too hard. Simply let each other know that you are interested and willing to talk. (2) Talk some more! Some discussions are private, or obviously. We do much better if we talk about what is bothering us in the moment instead of “holding back” and becoming resentful and bitter. (3) Make time for each other. Know when to give your full attention to a family member. (4) Choose and plan your topics. If it's not important in the long term, let it go. You will all be happier.