Index TEN POINTS ON RAISING CHILDREN WITH DISABILITIES Also remember that it is not your fault Accept your child as he is Faith will brighten your child's future Work with your child's doctors, physiotherapist and other professionals Advice : Be your child's advocate People will stare at you and make judgments Never be ashamed of your disabled child Are there any stories about you that you are not ashamed of? Treat your child as normally as possible and never impose limitations on him. Love that child with everything that is inside you TEN POINTS ON RAISING CHILDREN WITH DISABILITIES You are afraid of your child's future. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get Original EssayOn July 2, 1985, I will always remember that day. I went to work with my six month old daughter and did the things six month olds do. She was sitting alone. He was crawling and achieving his goals. While I was at work I received a terrible phone call. The person told me that my baby had been in an accident and was in the hospital. I left work immediately and didn't know what to expect. My heart was pounding and when I saw her I immediately collapsed. I was so hurt and angry that my son was hurt. Later the Doctor gave me the news. She told me that my daughter would never be able to walk and would be in a wheelchair for the rest of her life. He said his spinal cord was severed and could not be repaired with surgery. I went to work with a healthy little girl and came back to see that she couldn't sit up on her own and wasn't moving her legs. It hurt so much and I cried and cried. I didn't know how I would care for her, but I knew that I loved her and would do whatever it took to help her survive in this world. I knew that God gave her to me and that she had a purpose in this world. Years later I was pregnant with another baby. The doctor noticed during the ultrasound that there was something wrong with my baby. This time I was more prepared because the Doctor told me while I was pregnant with her. But I was still shocked and sad that it was happening again. They told me she would be severely developmentally disabled and I wanted to abort her. Of course I said no. This little girl couldn't do anything on her own. He couldn't walk. He couldn't speak but he could communicate to you with his voice. I was sad but I knew God wouldn't put more on you than you can handle. I felt like God gave me this little girl for a reason and she had a purpose too. I would love her, accept her and take care of her. I was his eyes ears hands legs everything. He needed a lot of care, so I was his nurse. I had to learn a lot of things to take care of her. I didn't mind though because she was a very happy and joyful little girl who burst out laughing all the time. He was very funny and always made me laugh. I didn't consider her a burden because she was so strong in her illness. When he got sick he recovered every time. He lived to be 17 years old. The doctors said that thanks to my love he lived longer than they expected. Most kids like her don't live that long. She outlived many children who had the same thing she had. Tip: First, be shocked when you hear that your child has a disability. You are afraid because you don't know what the future holds for your child, so you have to let it sink in. Find out what their limits will be and do your best to make them reach and go as far as they want. it can go according to its limits. Also remember that it's not your fault. Many times parents feel guilty as if they did something wrong for theirchild becomes disabled. I felt it was my fault because of the car accident because I was working at the time. I felt like if I wasn't working and I hadn't left her with this other person who caused her accident, this would never have happened to her. When I got pregnant with my other daughter and she was born with a severe disability. I started to wonder what was wrong with me. Why do I have two children with disabilities? Was I punished for something? I did something wrong to get cold in my womb which caused CMV in my daughter. As parents we often blame ourselves when our children are disabled. We think it's our fault and sometimes people even get angry at God. I asked God why. What I know is that life happens. Tip: Different people take different paths in life. Life isn't fair. I know there is a God and He will not put more on you than you can handle. I know he loves you and your special children he gave you and it doesn't do you or your children any good to walk around feeling guilty. Just give it to God. We don't understand why some things happen, but God knows why. Accept your child as he is. Once I received the diagnosis on both my children, I was shocked at first. But then I realized that I had to accept reality. I had to face it. But realize that the way they walk is with a wheelchair, walker, or braces. I played with my children in wheelchairs. I danced with them and made them dance to the music. I played with them. I took them to the store. At the mall. Tip: Accept your child for who they are and face reality. You have to face the fact that your child may not be able to run or walk like other children. But you too can play with your children in your own little way, whatever their diagnosis. Children with special needs can bring you a lot of joy. I'm not saying it isn't hard work taking care of them sometimes. Yes, sometimes you have to do more than other parents, but that's your reality. YES. Sometimes you feel tired and fatigued. It's not always easy. What you do is pray and ask God to give you the strength to take care of them. It is not easy to always turn to doctors. It's not easy to meet with a physical therapist, speech therapist, and occupational therapist every week. But that was my reality and you have to face it and face it head on. Faith will illuminate your child's future. I hugged them and showed them love. I was there for them all the time. I took my kids to church. I let them receive prayer from a pastor. I hoped they would do good in life. When I took my children to church, he taught that everyone has a purpose in life and that God loves everyone. This gave me and my daughter faith and hope and my daughter believed that she too had a purpose in life. There's a reason she was born. This is how I laid the foundation for my children by giving them faith and hope. Advice: Love your child with all your strength and have faith that he or she will be okay. You need to have faith that your child will be okay. Faith is hope. Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. Everyone has something wrong. It's just that you can see disabled people better. Remember that God gave you that child and he doesn't make mistakes. There are all kinds of people in this world. We are all children of God. Children with special needs are special in the eyes of God. I believe that. And if he gave them to you it means that you are a special parent who can handle taking care of a special child. Mentioning parents' love and hope plays a vital role in their children's success in life. Work with your child's doctors, physical therapist and other professionals Hotook my kids to doctor's appointments. I took them to physical therapy. With physiotherapy you work on your legs. I learned to do the exercises myself to do therapy on them at home. Occupational therapy works with your hands. Speech therapy works on their language. I learned what they were doing and did it at home. Sometimes your doctor will tell you that your child needs to wear back braces, leg braces, or hand splints. Whatever the doctor said my kids needed, I made sure they got it. If it was a certain type of medicine, I made sure they understood it. I listened to the doctor and asked questions if I didn't understand. Tip: It's a lot to deal with with children with special needs, but if you don't understand the doctor or therapist ask questions. Find out as much as you can about your child's condition. You have to know. You are their parent. Find out how to do the therapy at home. I had to do a lot of things a nurse does. I had to learn how to use a catheter. My youngest daughter couldn't eat by mouth, so I had to breastfeed her through a tube in her stomach. I had to be a mother and a nurse. You have to do what you have to do to keep your child going. Be your child's advocate When doctors told me one of my children wouldn't live long, I didn't just give up on her. He was lucky enough to make it to 17 years old. I continued to take care of her. I kept taking her to church. I kept taking her out. I fought for her. A physical therapist told me that my other daughter had a closed head injury. I didn't accept it. I knew my daughter was smart. She didn't accept it either. She attended Special Ed and later graduated from Oakland University with a bachelor's degree. She later became Miss Wheelchair. She is now married with two children. I raised a successful daughter. Tip: Fight for them. Everything the professionals say doesn't have to be true. Have faith in God. Help your child be the best he can be with his disability. You don't have to accept everything a professional says. Sometimes they can be wrong. You know your child better than doctors or professionals. You are their parent. You can also express your opinion. 22People stare at me and judge. Some people have asked me how my son ended up in a wheelchair. I told them he had been in a car accident. A doctor once told me to absolutely use a car seat. My daughter was in her car seat when she got hurt and I wasn't there. I was at work. When I dropped her off that morning she was in her car seat. This is what I mean when I say people might judge us as parents. I didn't like the looks. But so what? That hasn't stopped me from taking my kids out in public. I ignored them and paid no attention to them. Like I said before. Everyone has something wrong. Some people you can see better. I held my head high and pushed them through the mall or to church or whatever. Some people ask questions. I didn't care to answer the questions. Tip: Be aware of this when you go out in public with your child, especially if he or she is in a wheelchair or has braces or looks or acts different. You will get stares. I didn't like the looks. But so what? That hasn't stopped me from taking my kids out in public. I ignored them and paid no attention to them. Like I said before. Never be ashamed of your disabled child. Are there any stories about you that you are not ashamed of? Don't lock him in the house and say I'm trying to protect him from the world or keep him from getting hurt. I was never ashamed because those were my children and I had no reason to be ashamed. They are people too. There are.